Plaidophile

There was a major scientific discovery in the world of botany: bananas would relay sound vibrations to other bananas through unknown means. The closer the bananas' genomes, the clearer the relaying would be. Two bananas from the same bunch could be used as an effective form of communication.

The cellular phone companies all went out of business practically overnight. Acoustic modems were fit to bananas to provide an instant world-wide communications platform.

I was being interviewed (by banana) for a class on bio-ethics, when my good friends Bill and Hillary Clinton came into the room. So they joined in on the conversation.

Of course, there was a sudden surge of unexplained brain hemmorages.

---

On the subway this morning I kept on drifting in and out of consciousness, and occasionally drifted into a dream state. In one blip, I was in an episode of Futurama. While I was on vacation, all of New New York had been contained behind a force field because Santa Claus was... well, I don't remember, exactly, but it had something to do with Santa Claus. (The real one, not Robo-Santa.)