Font of frustration (music, random, rant)
Just as I was getting through the mob scene, a whole bunch of sirens broke out, with ambulances and police rushing towards the mob.
I just found out that I barely missed someone driving a car through the mob trying to run people over.
Meh.
Also right now Song Fight stuff is stressful. I was pulling an enani and came up with an alter-ego (<3, pronounced "less three") to do happy bubblegum-dance music with, and everything was going great but then one person randomly guessed (based on the avatar) that this person was me, and rather than keep on playing along he spoiled it for everyone (or for me, anyway). He's a notorious asshole who is always doing shit like this. The kicker is that he didn't even actually figure out it was me, he just randomly posted "fluffy porcupine! BUSTED!" based on the artistic style of the avatar, and then that got other people to look at the whois information on the website where I was storing the avatar pictures (which I had registered especially for this experiment).
I was trying to see a few things, namely how people would react to a completely new musician coming out of nowhere with something fairly well-produced, and how people would treat an energetic, constructive newbie since there's been so much antagonism between newcomers who want to mold the site in their own notions and veterans who are sick of them. And honestly, I liked being treated the way I was being treated, all the way up until SVEN THE GODDAMN ASSHOLE OUTING ME. And now nobody cares about this alter-ego, including me.
I guess the same thing happened when enani was "outed," but enani had a chance to be developed to the point that people continued to treat her as someone separate from me. But now I have basically no interest in keeping <3 going. Also I'm a bit frustrated that it's taken so long for the music to get posted, because that was the thing that was going to make this character work. But now everybody knows that this is just a silly musical experiment by me.
So, I'm feeling pretty bummed about this, and also now I have a new domain name that I don't feel like doing anything with. Oh well, it took me a year before I came up with something for beesbuzz.biz. I do kind of want to still do silly happy fun dance music though, but I was working on a couple of song ideas for next week but now I'm just feeling grumpy.
It also doesn't help that I really did only get 2 hours of sleep last night, and I'm tired and need to sleep, and I'm feeling like something was ripped away from me.
I'm not feeling very organized and this isn't a very happy or useful post so I guess I'll just post it now and blah.
Anyway I hope people still love my music even if they don't think it's by a cheerily ambiguous person of dubious origins.
(And, serves me right for trying something new again.)
Comments
what's left of the post history (Spud kindly deleted the thread where I was "outed" though, by my request, which is a bit unfortunate since a lot of character expression happened there up until the point that Sven "busted" me)
in a fit of rage I already deleted <3's silly weblog with the entry explaining the motivations behind the song.
If it's any consolation, I listened to the song without knowing it was you and I didn't recognize the voice as you so my reaction to it was not tainted by such knowledge.
EDIT:
Oh, I should also mention that I don't think there's anything wrong at all about creating new online personas for yourself. So it is way shitty that people reacted to it so negatively.
Jeeze, that's what everyone's said. It's like nobody else has ever watched anime.
Also that particular shade of purple... anime hair tends towards pale shades, usually, and the <3 avatar looks powerfully like your "nigiritude ultramarine" icons.
Next time you want to pull something like this, you can get someone else to do vocals and an avatar... ^ ^
I liked the <3 character. Cute personality.
I am impressed by the way it was hard to figure out if the poster was male or female, tho it definitely shows the female side more.
Anyway...
I don't think I ever got to hear that fight...
-bill
-bill