Plaidophile

So after getting home and getting the aforementioned bill, I was very frustrated. I called the billing department, which of course had an overly-cheery answering machine that just said that the office was closed and to please call back during business hours, but to leave a message I could press 1. I pressed 1 and it just replayed that message. So I hung up.

Then I sat down to type up the angry blog entry previously, and Werner jumped on my lap and as always started getting "playful" with my mouse. I lost it and yelled at him, and he was completely shocked and ran off in fear. I felt like the worst person in the world.

A few minutes later he came out and I decided I'd play with him again with his favorite toy (a stick with a long swatch of multicolored fabric) to try to calm down, and then I just got another twitch while thinking about the stupid bill and everything else, and I just felt like I needed to let out a lot of anger and just started whipping at the ground and I guess I started swearing louder and louder, and then Werner ran off, completely frightened, yet again, and it was several minutes before I calmed down enough to find Werner and pet him and apologize and calm him down.

Right now he's sitting next to me, and I know that I wouldn't do anything to actually hurt him (and that if I did hurt him I don't know what I'd even do) and I just need to pet him and talk softly to him and not think about the things that make me so angry.

I need a healthier outlet.

At this point, Werner is basically Toby, only bluish-gray, and with a Shooby-esque tendency to headbutt (and Shooby-esque butt hygiene, unfortunately). We're getting along fine although he seems to get bored easily.

Also he's a dangerously smart cat. He's figured out how to open my closet doors, so it's hard to keep things off-limits from him. He especially likes the front hall closet, which is full of dust and crap and also potentially-dangerous tools that I'd rather he not prowl around near. But it's mostly the dust that I'd like him to avoid.

I think the big breakthrough came on Saturday when I decided to give him a bath (because his fur was filthy). He actually didn't mind it too much, and he's been a lot more affectionate since then. I did make the mistake of using some fairly fragrant shampoo on him, though, and he still smells of it, which makes me think that he hasn't been keeping himself clean since then, probably because of said shampoo. I think I'll just keep bathing him once a week or until he stops putting up with it.

Or "catus," if you will.

Dear furry artists who insist on drawing platypi:

• They are not birds. The "duck" bill is an example of convergent evolution. They do not have feathers. They are not in any way "avian."
• Their eggs are soft-shelled and leathery like a snake's, not hard like a chicken's.
• The tail is shaped somewhat like a beaver's, but it's not actually a beaver tail (to start with, it's furred); it's a rudder and a fat reserve, not a piece of construction equipment. This also does not mean that they are in any other way like a beaver. In particular they don't have buckteeth, or in fact teeth at all. Moreover, this means that their tails are not like that of the following species:
  • Fox
  • Wolf
  • Squirrel
  • Dinosaur
  • Whatever the hell it is has long flowing locks of hair instead of a tail
• They do not have breasts or nipples. They secrete milk directly through the skin. I suppose you could take some artistic license and make them a bit curvy but they still shouldn't have gigantic nipples with areolae.
• Being monotremes (which literally means "one hole"), they have a cloaca, which the penis or vagina is hidden in. A hermaphroditic platypus would probably look just like a male platypus. They would not let it all "hang out."
• Also, if you really must insist on drawing one in a state of arousal, the penis has four heads on it.

Or: why I had to do a load of laundry at 4:30 AM

The moment we were all waiting for...

1. The interview went very well and they will be making me an offer in two weeks after they do the full research into what I'm worth (they have a fixed payscale based on experience and skills)
2. Animal control found Shooby this morning (after three weeks)

While I was in DC, my cat, Shooby, decided to wander off for a few days. He does this now and then, but never has he done it at Delphine's house. Hopefully he's okay...

And then I also just found out that Shooby Taylor who I named my cat after died back in June, but nobody who actually gave a shit found out until September 9th. Argh.