Random: Every episode of Boston Legal (2008/11/01)

Shirley Schmidt: So you see your Gayness--
The Honorable Judge Brown: EXCUSE ME!
Schmidt: I'm sorry, your "honor," I believe that by bringing enough frivolous lawsuits and badgering you and the jury, I can make the law match my ultra-Liberal fantasy world's.
Brown: Well, I disagree with you...but you're right. The court finds for the plaintiff.
Katie Lloyd: Jerry, you're impossible to deal with.
Jerry Espenson: Well you know it's my Asperger's acting up.
Katie: Yes, but you're so brilliant!
Jerry: Brilliant! Brilliant! Prrrrrr
William Shatner is Captain James T. Kirk and also Denny Crane: You pinko commie liberal fags are all the same.
James Spader is Shatner's Clone and also Alan Shore: Kirk^H^H^H^H Denny! You wound me!
Denny: Sorry, that's the mad-senile-cow-dementia-Alzheimer's.
Alan: You know I love you, right?
Denny [pulling Alan into the classic Kirk-kissing-Uhura position]: Keep it in your pants, sugarlips.
Transcript

Unity: Tsan Rumio (2008/11/03)

Hira [narrating]: Several rounds ago, Tsan was off on one of her reckless adventures. She fancied herself to be something of an "explorer," and was intensely curious about the strange items in the cave. Goodness knows what she thought she might find.
[[Tsan Rumio, grinning and playing with drone robots]]
Hira: As always, she returned empty-handed, but not without bizarre stories and an intense fire in her eyes.
Hira: She claimed that she found a shrine in which the spirits of the dead could talk to her. When asked what they said, she could not make any sense -- her words became erratic and incomprehensible, and even her sparkle became like that of a... foreign being.
[[Tsan coaxes an orange/brown male Kayohash with tales of intrigue and suspense, while Eugene and Hira look on in worry and/or disgust]]
Hira: Somehow, she recruited several others into her little cult. They all went to see the shrine, and they all went just as insane.
Hira [pouring hot water into a tea pot]: I decided this was far more than we could handle, so I contacted the Southern government. Delegates came and took away the contents of the shrine, and Tsan and her followers killed themselves in despair.
Hira: I'll never forget Tsan's altered sparkle, Juni...
Hira: It was just like yours.
Transcript

Journal: Civic duty (2008/11/04)

fluffy: [[red plaid]] Hi, metaphorical self-portrayal of the cartoonist here. It's been a while.
fluffy: If you're an American over the age of 18, today is a very important day.
fluffy: The last 8 years have been difficult for everyone. Economic turmoil, the erosion of rights, and acts carried out in the names of "freedom" and "security."
fluffy: Every day, decisions are made for us, choices are taken away.
fluffy: But there is still one choice we all can make.
fluffy: As individuals we may feel powerless, yet our collective voice can still be heard, but only if we let it.
fluffy: So go out and vote. Please.
fluffy: Comics can wait. The Internet will still be here when you get back.
Transcript

Random: A hollow victory (2008/11/05)

Back tab: Results by county
Front tab: Margin of victory
Title: Proposition 8: Gay marriage ban
[[map of California with brown or green circles of varying sizes on each county]]
Label: Eureka
Label: Redding
Label: Chico
Label: Yuba City
Label: Santa Rosa
Label: Sacramento
Label: San Francisco
Label: Stockton
Label: Modesto
Label: SF
Label: San Jose
Label: Salinas
Label: Fresno
Label: San Luis Obispo
Label: Bakersfield
Label: Santa Barbara
Label: San Bernardino
Label: Los Angeles
Label: Santa Ana
Label: Palm Springs
Label: Oceanside
Label: San Diego
Label: El Centro
Green bar: Yes: 5,163,908 (52%)
Brown bar: No: 4,760,336 (48%)
Grey box: No results
Text: Precincts reporting 95.4%
Label: Available races
Dropdown box: Proposition 8: Gay marriage ban
Text: About this proposition
Label: Filters
Dropdown box: No filters
Check box: [[checked]] Show Cities
Link: Share this map
Text: As of 08:11 AM
Transcript

Unity: Channel surfing (2008/11/06)

[[seen from one of the robots]]
demiJuni: Argh, Juni, come on, get mom out here already!
demiJuni: What the breeze are you doing in there?!
Eugene: Huh, the li'l bugger is sparklin' a-
demiJuni: Meh. What are Chandra/Kandra up to?
Speaking Corentin: "Court summons was required?" Why is that phrase used so much?
Speaking Corentin: This is so frustrating. This language has no orthography...
Autistic Corentin: Honk?
Speaking Corentin: Stop that.
Autistic Corentin: Honk!
Speaking Corentin: I sad stop that, you retard!
Autistic Corentin: Honkhonk! Honk!
Speaking Corentin [plucking a feather from his brother's neck]: Yes, the light is on again, I don't breezing care!
Autistic Corentin: Hrronk!
demiJuni: Hey, that's not nice!
Transcript

Unity: Preemptive multitasking (2008/11/11)

[[demiJuni is still watching Chandra/Kandra]]
Speaking Corentin: [[on datanode]] Argh, Tamu, do you know where Juni is? I'd like it to take a look at-
demiJuni: I'm in here!
Speaking Corentin: You haven't either? I see. I'm losing my feathers here.
Speaking Corentin: No, there's a light which keeps coming on, and it makes my simping brother go nuts.
Autistic Corentin: Honk?
Speaking Corentin: yes, once a deci or so.
Speaking Corentin: Yes, I was hoping Juni could figure it out- yeah, it seemed to have some insight before.
Speaking Corentin: Ha, yes, almost as if it were a Homin itself. Wouldn't that make it easy.
[[Autistic Corentin pecks at device]] <<peck peck>>
Speaking Corentin: Ack, I've got to go. He's fiddling with the input device again.
demiJuni: No, don't stop him!
Tamu: [[via simulation]] I'll let you know what I can find out.
demiJuni: Guh?
Tamu: Ah, Juni, so nice to see you again. How are you feeling today?
demiJuni: Tamu? What are you doing with- Oh, you're in here with me!
Tamu: Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were in a sleep cycle. I will have Sasha adjust your circadian rhythm so I don't disrupt your dreams again.
Transcript

Unity: At ease (2008/11/13)

demiJuni: Tamu... you said I died. How?
Tamu: You were assassinated. In fact, an investigation is underway... it's a rather complex affair. It seems Captain Lombard never got over the... well, we don't need to get into specifics..
demiJuni: I would like to.
Tamu: Oh, very well. About a round ago, when you were first... having issues with reality, it seems that the good Captain saw you as a threat to Sam's well-being, and he acted to protect his junior agent. His initial attempt failed, but a few days ago, he had Agent Tanya Harris snipe at you. Sam was with you and Harris killed him as well. Your bodies haven't been found, but we have a full confession and sufficiently convincing evidence.
Tamu: I... know this must be difficult for you to hear.
demiJuni: Oh, no! It puts me at ease!
demiJuni: [[in smaller blue text]] I thought you might have been lying, but you were just wrong, as usual.
Tamu: Sorry, what was that? It didn't translate fully.
demiJuni: Oh, nothing. ^_^
Transcript

Unity: Multiplicity (2008/11/18)

Tamu: Juni, I have to say that this attitude of yours is rather... different. Not that I am complaining.
demiJuni: Different? How so?
Tamu: Well, I should say that by now you would have normally turned... sour.
demiJuni: "By now?"
Tamu: Oh, of course, you see, you aren't the first simulation of Juni Melrose. In the past, every one we've run has eventually become shall we say, spiteful.
demiJuni: If you were stuck in here you would probably turn into frozen concentrated hate juice too.
Tamu: I... see. Quite. In any case, one of your previous incarnations managed to do something quite interesting... while you were alive, you somehow managed to introduce new memories into yourself.
demiJuni: Wait, which you am I?
Tamu: Tsk, grammar.
Transcript

Unity: Sparkle (2008/11/20)

Tamu: In any event, this led me to learn about your species' natural electroreception.
demiJuni: Oh, yes, [[Kajoshi]] sparkle! [[Hiero]] I never told you about that?
Tamu: Quite. It seems that your organic brain was able to interpret the energy signatures coming from the synthetic one.
Tamu: And, at some point, your organic brain became so attuned that the simulation was able to, shall we say, "collaborate."
Tamu: [[to people at door]] Yes, if you would bring him in now.
Tamu: I think you may be able to directly communicate with other Spadetails as well.
Tamu: In any case, in order to test this theory, I have annexed this prostitute.
demiJuni: What?!
Seth: Pardon me, sir, but I prefer the term "personal assistant."
Seth: Hey, that thing is [[Kajoshi]] sparkling [[Hiero]] weirdly,. What is it?
Transcript

Unity: Seeing double (2008/11/25)

[[back in Kajoshu]]
Eugene: Huh, the li'l bugger is sparkling again.
Juni: Really? What's it saying?
Eugene: Naw, it just stopped. Oh well.
Eugene: So you're back-- Oh, hello, Mother!
Hira: Hello, Eugene. Have you eaten?
Eugene: Aw, jeeze, now that I see you side-by-side...
Eugene: Oh! I get it, you're a parth!
Juni: Yes, I'm *that* kind of abomination.
Hira: Juni! Having no father is nothing to be ashamed of.
Transcript

Unity: Complicated (2008/11/27)

Eugene: Why didn't ya just say so? Who cares?
Juni: [crossing its arms] I care! It's just another stupid thing reminding me that I'm supposed to be female. Gah.
Hira: Why does that matter? So you're a lesbian like me.
Juni: But I'm not like you, and I'm not a lesbian!
Hira: So what is your relationship with Sam?
Juni: "Complicated."
Hira: Speaking of which, I would like to finally meet her.
Juni: "Him," mom. [in Hiero] Jarbreeze! I never should have simping told you about that.
Eugene: I'm sorry, ma'ams, but this is a very confusing conversation.
Transcript
Recap: 8.Hearing

News box

2008/11/13: Back-scratching

Bengo wrote a nice brief review of my comics. Thanks, Bengo!

You should read his and his wife's comics Li'l Nyet and Scratchin Post, two semi-metaphorical treatises on the socioeconomic ramifications of varying political gestalts throughout history, both observed and subjunctive, as portrayed by talking cats.