It sure would be nice to not be in pain all the time

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There are so many things I’d like to be doing with my time, except every time I start on any of them I get a major pain flareup. And that makes it really hard to get into what I’m doing, and then the moment I have any minor setback (such as a problem with the tool I’m using) that just makes the pain explode even further and then all I can focus on is how much I’m hurting.

I’d love to be making 3D models for VRChat or drawing comics or making music, but all of those things just feel so inaccessible to me right now. And even playing games hurts, and even hanging out in VRChat can be pretty painful too because even standing up for an hour at a time is awful (and doing VRChat while sitting down has its own share of issues).

I’m grateful that I don’t have to worry about money so much, but gosh, there’s more to being productive than making a living. Quality of life is important and that feels just so lacking right now.

I just feel like so much stuff is locked inside my head and screaming to get out, and I sure wish I could just like. Not be like that.

Native Instruments Intel/Silicon Update

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Previously I’d posted about an update to Native Instruments' Komplete Kontrol plugin wrapper that made it no longer work with Intel plugins on Apple Silicon machines. After I’d posted that, Jeremy from Native Instruments posted a link to download Komplete Kontrol 2.7.2 which can be used as a temporary workaround to fix the issue, with a warning that it’d be better to update KK and then run Logic under Rosetta instead.

I failed to notice this update from them since NI’s forum never manages to actually send me notification emails for some reason, but in any case, this is a nice solution to keep things working until Reaktor and Battery get updated for M1 (hopefully in just a month or two).

Anyway, hopefully this is helpful for folks who need it.

Relaunching my Patreon

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I continue to not be a fan of Patreon but it’s, unfortunately, the easiest way to try to get recurring support from folks for the things I do. So, if you’re interested in throwing a few bucks my way every month, here you go. $1/month gives you access to the subscriber-only section of my Discord, and $3/month gives you downloads of all the things I release digitally (albums, comic collections, etc.) going forward. I’ll also probably backfill my existing releases there at some point.

I also of course have a ko-fi. It currently doesn’t support the exclusive-access downloads thing (because ko-fi charges $6/month for that ability) but I’ll definitely enable that if I have a few people sign up there. I’d definitely prefer folks to support me via Ko-Fi rather than Patreon, if they can; it’s a much nicer company.

But regardless, I appreciate whatever support people feel like sending my way, and any suggestions people have for what I should be doing with my time (within my abilities and interests, of course).

Estradiol, patch form

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Back in November of 2017 I had a pulmonary embolism, the result of a DVT which was the result of a combination of risk factors. At the time that it occurred, the insistence from the hematologist was that I’d have to cease the use of estradiol entirely, and this led to the worst month of physical and mental health that I can remember. I was basically going through menopause. A month later, a different hematologist said there was no reason I couldn’t keep taking estradiol, especially since I was on a course of warfarin to clear up remaining clot.

A couple years after that I had another minor DVT, and this led to needing to be on blood thinners, so now I take Xarelto daily, and likely will for the rest of my life.

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on GPT-3, and my discontinuation of its use

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I just learned that OpenAI, the company behind GPT-3, is founded and funded by Elon Musk. I mostly feel foolish for having not looked into the company at all, especially given that this isn’t exactly a hidden fact or anything. Very much my bad for not doing even the remote bit of due diligence when it comes to a piece of tech that seems to be completely changing how people think about… well, everything.

I’ve mostly been using it for shitposts, but I’ve also been playing with it for iterating on song lyrics. All that now feels tainted.

I have taken down my GPT-3 posts from this site, and I will be discontinuing my use of it going forward. The one song I’ve finished that had any GPT-3 involvement will stay in my catalogue (as it’s a somewhat personal song to me and GPT-3 only helped with a couple of lines in the end) but as interested as I was in experimenting with new tech (knowing fully well the ethical concerns with how its training set was generated) this has brought into perspective how I was participating in something I don’t want to encourage.

I apologize for playing any part in normalizing this.

Kitchen day 11, almost complete!

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Today they actually mostly-finished the stuff they said they were going to do, and things are looking pretty swell. In particular, they did the spice shelves, the door handles, the baseboards, and the over-the-fridge cabinet.

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